The Perfect Candidate

Wow, it really IS a Great Day in South Carolina! Here is Talking Points Memo with the details:

South Carolina Lt. Gov. Ken Ard, who spent campaign money on a Playstation, women’s clothing, iPads and his wife’s cell phone bill, will submit his resignation on Friday morning.

“During my campaign, it was my responsibility to make sure things were done correctly,” Ard said in a press release, according to The State. “I did not do that.”

Ard said he “must take full ownership and resign from the Office of Lieutenant Governor … I am deeply sorry and take full responsibility.”

Here is where I really have to ask a simple question: what exactly is the problem, anyway? All Lieutenant Governor Ard really did was uphold the preeminent value of modern day America: consumerism. In fact, I would argue that Lieutenant Governor Ard is actually a true American hero for helping to so vigorously stimulate the economy at a time when the nation is still trying to recover from the lingering effects of the Great Recession. Come on, South Carolina, LEAVE LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR KEN ARD ALONE!

Oh come on, Bill. The man used his campaign funds to purchase stuff for his own personal use and the use of his family. That's a crime. Certainly you of all people should be demanding that Ard be vigorously prosecuted. You going soft on us?

Not at all. For what is a campaign contribution, anyway? It is money given to a candidate by either a rich asshole who is trying to buy influence or a delusional twit who still thinks their vote really matters. Either way, I really don't give a flying fuck what happens to their money after they willingly surrender it to some scumbag politician. If Ard didn't spend it on a Playstation, he likely would have instead bought some stupid teevee attack ads or something equally corrosive and wasteful. At least his Playstation and his wife's cell phone won't be responsible for helping to dumb down the public discourse.


Bonus: "Big man, pig man...ha ha, charade you are"