Suckin' It for the Holidays

So lemme just say this to the four straight guys who are here, tonight, for you, coming to my show, it's gonna kinda be like being molested, you're gonna have to go to a safe place. I got nothing for you, you know how when you're getting molested, and, you know what I mean? The priest is here, and then you're getting molested and, you know, you had a nice dinner and then it's time for the molestation and you have to just go to a safe place. Maybe a hammock in Hawaii. Whatever that safe place is, for you four straight guys, go there, go there right now. I've got nothing for you, have a drink, have several. And to the ladies that bought them, you owe them a serious blowjob later. A serious committed blowjob, some ball-tickling and some swallowing, that's right. It's gonna be that kinda night. Sorry, I apologise. Sorry. I'm going long tonight, cause I got a lot of material for this fucking holiday CD.

~ Kathy Griffin from "Suckin' It for the Holidays"
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